In this subtle and moving essay at Off Assignment, J.Y. Lee reflects on the life of his father, who is barely getting by and living alone in America. In this “letter to a stranger,” Lee considers the similarities and differences that exist between generations, regardless of their geographical and emotional distance.

A part of me suspects my restlessness stems from you—a fear of ending up like you. An ever-present, existential anxiety that if I don’t push hard enough, move fast enough, I won’t be able to outrun you. That the inevitable will catch up—the sorrow, the sadness, the ability to somehow so spectacularly mess up my own life—and I’ll wind up in your shoes, in a cage of my own making, too.

More picks about fathers

My Father, Guitar Guru to the Rock Gods

Nancy Walecki | The Atlantic | August 7, 2025 | 8,475 words

“When the greatest musicians of the 1970s needed an instrument—or a friend—my dad was there.”

My Father Tries to Teach Me His Map of Chicago

Maggie Andersen | Electric Literature | April 10, 2025 | 3,885 words

“He’s been the cartographer all along, steadfastly believing I’d learn to read his directions.”

My Father, the Artist

A.W. Davis | Harper’s Bazaar | June 16, 2023 | 990 words

“I developed a new appreciation for my dad, who always treated me like a fellow artist, creating myself.”