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Mallory Ortberg’s Favorite Advice Columns
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Mallory Ortberg
Mallory Ortberg Last year, I became an advice columnist. This is my only qualification for being an advice columnist, as I am quite literally just some guy. “Noted some guy Mallory Ortberg.” Here are a few of my favorite advice columns:
1. “The Monty Hall Problem” (Marilyn vos Savant, Parade Magazine)
Priceonomics describes this column thusly:
When vos Savant politely responded to a reader’s inquiry on the Monty Hall Problem, a then-relatively-unknown probability puzzle, she never could’ve imagined what would unfold: though her answer was correct, she received over 10,000 letters, many from noted scholars and Ph.Ds, informing her that she was a hare-brained idiot.
What ensued for vos Savant was a nightmarish journey, rife with name-calling, gender-based assumptions, and academic persecution.
Who Wrote ‘Happy Birthday’?
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Julia Wick
Julia Wick Photo by Pixabay
Most musicologists who’ve traced the origins of “Happy Birthday” agree that its musical score dates back to the work of two Kentucky sisters in the late 19th century: Mildred Jane Hill (b.1859), and Patty Smith Hill (b.1868).
After graduating as valedictorian of Louisville Collegiate Institute, Patty went on to be a central figure in the progressive education movement, endorsing hands-on learning techniques and interactive teaching methods. She invented “Patty Hill Blocks” — a set of large, cardboard bricks that children could use to learn about structural engineering — and then founded the Institute of Child Welfare Research at Columbia University Teachers College.
In 1889, while serving as a kindergarten teacher at a Kentucky grade school, she began working on a set of childrens’ songs with her older sister Mildred, a well-known organist, composer, and “Negro music” scholar. Four years later, the two released their first collection of tunes in a book titled “Song Stories for the Kindergarten.” Among the songs, was a little ditty entitled “Good Morning to All,” which would later be the source of the sheet music for “Happy Birthday.”
—Zachary Crockett writing for Pricenomics about who owns the copyright to “Happy Birthday.” Update: On Tuesday, September 22, a federal judge struck down Warner/Chappell Music’s long-standing claim to the copyright for “Happy Birthday.”
How Prop Money From a Hollywood Blockbuster Ended Up Confiscated by Secret Service
Posted by Julia Wick
Julia Wick Photo: Wikimedia Commons
In late 2000, the producers and crew for action flick Rush Hour 2 gathered at the now-defunct Desert Inn in Las Vegas and prepared to blow up a casino. The scene, which pitted policemen and Secret Service agents against a counterfeiter attempting to launder $100 million in superdollars, was to culminate with hundreds of thousands of fake bills floating through the air.
After several days of filming, the sequence was a success. Then, something incredibly odd happened. The bills, which had been supplied by a major Hollywood prop house, were picked up by movie extras and passersby and were attempted to be passed off as legal tender in various stores along the strip. The authorities weren’t too thrilled. Secret Service agents glided in, swiftly detained somewhere north of $100 million worth of prop money, then accused the prop maker — Independent Studio Services (ISS) — of counterfeiting, and ordered a cease and desist on all of their faux cash.
For ISS (the company who produced the money), the premise of Rush Hour 2 had become a reality — and they were penned as the bad guy. Sadly, their story is indicative of a constant dilemma faced by prop suppliers in Hollywood: the necessity to skirt the line between strict counterfeiting laws and producers’ demands for incredibly realistic money.
—Zachary Crockett, writing for Priceonomics about the real business of fake Hollywood money.
State of the #Longreads, 2014
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Mark Armstrong
Mark Armstrong Lately there has been some angst about the state of longform journalism on the Internet. So I thought I’d share some quick data on what we’ve seen within the Longreads community: Read more…
The Top 5 Longreads of the Week
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Longreads
Longreads Below, our favorite stories of the week. Kindle users, you can also get them as a Readlist.
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Top 5 Longreads of the Week
Posted by Mark Armstrong
Mark Armstrong 
Our favorite stories of the week, featuring The New York Times, Wall Street Journal, SB Nation, Priceonomics and Esquire, with a guest pick by Sasha Belenky.
The Most Difficult Age to Be When You Work in Hollywood
Posted by Mark Armstrong
Mark Armstrong “The Writer’s Guild of America has a term for my situation: They call it ‘The Gap.’ It’s the time period between when your years as a working writer end and your retirement begins. I actually have an excellent pension for when I finally retire. The Guild is a strong union and it has negotiated an excellent pension plan for writers who have more than seven consecutive years of service. When I finally hit 65, my WGA pension combined with Social Security means I should have a comfortable retirement.
“I was 46 when I had my last writing job in television. That meant I faced a 19 year Gap. As with other writers facing The Gap, my resume was a problem. I worked as a publishing executive before becoming a writer. I had a nice, solid resume that showed constant forward progress in my publishing career from financial analyst to business manager to circulation director. Which is great… except that progress ended in 1991 and I was applying in 2004.
“I sent off resumes and scored occasional interviews. But the interviewers mainly wanted to hear Hollywood stories and then said, ‘Thanks we’ll be in touch.’ I don’t blame them. I’d hire the person currently working in the magazine business instead of the guy who had a lot of amusing stories about comedy writing but hadn’t worked in a publishing environment for more than a decade.”
–David Raether, a former sitcom writer who went from a $300,000 income to being homeless in Los Angeles, in a Priceonomics excerpt from his new book. Read more on being homeless.
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Celebrating Four Years of Longreads
Posted by Longreads
Longreads
Longreads just celebrated its fourth birthday, and it’s been a thrill to watch this community grow since we introduced this service and Twitter hashtag in 2009. Thank you to everyone who participates, whether it’s as a reader, a publisher, a writer—or all three. And thanks to the Longreads Members who have made it possible for us to keep going.
To celebrate four years, here’s a rundown of some of our most frequent #longreads contributors, and some of their recent recommendations:
#1 – @matthiasrascher
The Master of Nasty – A homage to Raymond Chandler. j.mp/12wOiOZ #literature #longreads
— Matthias Rascher (@matthiasrascher)
#2 – @hriefs
“A House on the River.” @esquiremag #longreads on how Bill Petit put his life back together after losing his family bit.ly/ZhAM1U
— Howard Riefs (@hriefs)
#3 – @roamin
In John They Trust / Smithsonian Magazine ow.ly/khqNh #longreads #cargocults
— roamin (@roamin)
#4 – @jalees_rehman
Now, Without Any Further Ado, We Present … The Digital Public Library of America! #longreads @dpla fb.me/23mV5kHft
— Jalees Rehman (@jalees_rehman)
#5 – @LAReviewofBooks
“Jonathan Rosenbaum is one of our keenest observers of contemporary ‘film culture.’” | Goodbye, Cinema: owl.li/kap1b #longreads
— LA Review of Books (@LAReviewofBooks)
#6 – @TheAtlantic
‘Going to the woods is going home’: John Muir on his beloved Yosemite Valley theatln.tc/11eVFYo #EarthDay #longreads
— The Atlantic (@TheAtlantic)
#7 – @nxthompson
Dick Cheney and the bureaucracy vs a satellite and climate science. @popsci #longreads popsci.com/technology/art…
— Nicholas Thompson (@nxthompson)
#8 – @faraway67
On the Brink of Extinction: A Closer Look at Endangered Species bit.ly/10HzpHP #extinction #environment #longreads
— Barbara Mack (@faraway67)
#9 – @PocketHits
“The Tyranny of the Taxi Medallions.” @priceonomics bit.ly/120veIK #MostSaved #longreads
— PocketHits (@PocketHits)
#10 – @legalnomads
Your Sunday reading, all in one place: top 5 #longreads of the week: bit.ly/13IAxzt
— Jodi Ettenberg (@legalnomads)
#11 – @brainpicker
Wow. Mapping marine ecologist Bob Paine’s academic family tree j.mp/XeBMxt From @edyong209‘s ace #longreads j.mp/XeBNS9
— Maria Popova (@brainpicker)
#12 – @LineHolm1
Pulitzer winner 2013, feature writing is @nytimes‘ “Snow Fall” – recommended #longreads pulitzer.org/works/2013-Fea…
— Line Holm Nielsen (@LineHolm1)
#13 – @Guardian
.@guardiang2: Norwegian prison where inmates are treated like people gu.com/p/3e298/tw #longreads
— The Guardian (@guardian)
#14 – @stonedchimera
When an American learnt by spending a summer at an Indian Call Center bit.ly/QDnA1m . Essential reading from Mother Jones. #Longreads
— Sairam Krishnan (@stonedchimera)
#15 – @MosesHawk
An anthropologist joins the ranks of the under appreciated sanitation workers of New York City. bit.ly/15Cupsp #longreads
— Moses Hawk (@MosesHawk)
#16 – @James_daSilva
Unearthing the Complete and Total Disaster That Was ‘The Chevy Chase Show’ | Splitsider splitsider.com/2013/04/uneart… #longreads
— James daSilva (@James_daSilva)
#17 – @chrbutler
Inspiring WIRED profile of Primer director Shane Carruth: bit.ly/ZbkgdJ #longreads
— Christopher Butler (@chrbutler)
#18 – @eugenephoto
Enjoying this: how to spend 47 hours on a train and not go crazy. nytimes.com/2013/03/03/mag… #travelreads #longreads
— Eugene (@eugenephoto)
#19 – @jaredbkeller
All is not well at the @todayshow nym.ag/ZNIUoh #longreads tip @mediagazer
— Jared Keller (@jaredbkeller)
#20 – @morgank
True Crime: How a Mysterious Beaumont, Texas, Murder Was Solved | Vanity Fair vnty.fr/ZI48bb #longreads
— Potato Crypts (@morgank)
#21 – @dougcoulson
Curses! Archduke Franz Ferdinand and His Astounding Death Car | Past Imperfect blogs.smithsonianmag.com/history/2013/0… via @smithsonianmag #longreads
— Doug Coulson (@dougcoulson)
#22 – @LaForgeNYT
Grizzly Bear Members Are Indie-Rock Royalty, But What Does That Buy Them in 2012? | New York Magazi… lgrd.co/OzjhpQ #longreads
— Follow @Palafo (@LaForgeNYT)
#23 – @stephen_abbott
Let’s Get Physical: The Psychology of Effective Workout Music by @ferrisjabr scientificamerican.com/article.cfm?id… via @aeonmag cc @biobeatslive #longreads
— Stephen Abbott (@stephen_abbott)
#24 – @venkatananth
<opInside Ajmal Amir Kasab’s mind. “What turned a village boy to a cold-blooded killer” #longreads by @barneyhenderson – telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews…
— Venkat Ananth (@venkatananth)
#25 – @weegee
#deepinterviews called “liberating the essay.” Really called “Written for Kevin” bit.ly/ZyQsbn #longreads (cc: @kimthedork)
— Kevin Smokler (@Weegee)
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