Stuff Julian Schnabel Told Me In His Ex-Wife’s Living Room Last Night

“he touches Dan Colen’s painting with his fingers, moving his fingers over the birdshit lumps, and looks unimpressed. he asks me if i’ve heard of Dan Colen and i say ‘yeah because i read a lot about Dash Snow after he died.’ as we’re standing next to the bird shit painting, i tell Julian Schnabel about the tiny Pacific island nation of Nauru, which is the fattest country in the world (97% of men and 93% of women are overweight or obese), because, re: the birdshit painting, the island’s chief export is guano, which is the excrement of bats, birds, and seals. the island got really rich off selling this shit to the rest of the world for fertilizer, and then the rest of the world repaid Nauru by making it the fattest country. Julian Schnabel is entertained”

Source: The Awl
Published: Mar 30, 2011
Length: 9 minutes (2,397 words)

Das Racist: ‘We’re Not Racist, We Love White People: Ford Trucks, Apple Pies, Bald Eagles’

last week Das Racist’s new mixtape got a glowing review and a score of 8.7 out of 10 on pitchfork, and a coveted Best New Music designation, and then the next day i was in central park seeing Pavement and when Pavement was finished playing, i texted Himanshu, one of the rappers in Das Racist, to see if i could ask him some questions.

Source: The Awl
Published: Sep 28, 2010
Length: 22 minutes (5,721 words)